eloquent and self assured
an artist's grasp of insecure
I fashion the most unlikely ideas. I sometimes scare the crap out of myself. I am nocturnal. I am conceited. I'm a mess. Writing is my escape, jotting down kept
emotions is fun (try it haha). I may elaborate way too much on a simple thought, so feel free to stop me whenever you want. My mom lets me
carry a swiss knife whenever I go out. I am a very random person, hello XD I PMS like a betch. I am in love with Katy Perry :3 And no I'm not a
lesbian.
Cheers.
Layout: vehemency
Icon: reruntherace
stop.
Thursday, February 22, 2007, 2/22/2007 09:47:00 PM
THINGS TO DO:1. Make a banner for our team
2. Get ready for a basketball game
3. Finish the project in bio
4. Accomplish the play
5. Get a goddamn life.
Mom was right, things aren't the same now. Everything happened so fast, I lost track of my own reality once again. I'm confused, I'm bitter, I'm exhausted, I'm anticipating, I'm in anxiety, I'm careless, and I'm about to burst. This is so weird, the things happening around us, and the feelings shared are just so weird. Lately I've been so busy with my schoolwork, maybe it's better this way. with my mind pre-occupied with a lot of things I'll forget every pain, every damn pain. Have you ever felt so desperate, that you hang on to something that's not even there anymore? And you can't do anything about it, 'cause you don't have the right anymore. It's irritating. It kills.
And it all comes back to me in the end. We are so strange I can almost taste the bitter part of this so called sweet life. I'm tired. Can we just stop for a moment, retrace every step, and go back to the beginning? Can we just find a way to let this go and be happy with our lives?
I admit, I don't want to to get back together and redo the same cycle again. We've done that before and nothing happened. But i can't force myself not to miss those days. I don't want to be cold. It's over, so why am I hurting?
I'll be honest, since the only one I can cry to now is myself alone, I'm not ready for this kind of tragedy. My heart is weak believe it or not. And having to face life on my own is what makes it harder. I have so many questions, so many grievances, all enclosed in the chamber of silence.
Bat natin hinayaan mapunta tayo sa ganito?